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Submitted by tooeviltoknow (May 19, 2005)

Here are a few things that I noticed: ...responsibility" , she thought... the comma has to be placed inside the quotation mark. "Wow!! is she beautiful or what!!" , Ragav thought. 'is' should be capitalized, there should also be question marks and that comma is not needed. It should look something like this: "Wow!! Is she beautiful or what?!?!" Ragav thought. "She is so cute.", Ragav thought as she was descending the stairs to the metro. She smiled at Ragav. You need to remove the comma and replace that period with it. "Wow!!", Ragav. Yep, there's no need for the comma. Also, this would be a good time to use something else other then 'thought.' Maybe "Wow!!" Ragav exclaim, if somewhat louder than he had expected. "...commitment.", she said. replace the period with the comma and remove that extra comma. "...questions", thought Ragav. Comma belongs on the inside. care." , she said. "In 'Varam' both man and women..." It's both man and woman. Man is singular so women has to be the same as well. Ragav was a normal human male he was a sperm-donor, not a life-supporter. There should be a comma after male. Also, I see no communication between those men at all. I'm sure they were mad when she decided to choose him. Just a thought. Anyway, I hope you're no discouraged by all of this.